Quarantine (REC)

Locked up

up and away

as the world rots

and rotates all

around me

I am waiting for

something to give

break and bend

or crack then crumble

we can't go on long

like we currently are

When is it ever

gunna be enough?

I can't even look

out the window without

seeing disappointment

the air has a funny taste

and I've been coughing

jus a lil too often for

mine or anyone's liking

Soon will come the gathering

roundups of the desolate

and desperate actions

lead deadly consequences

all the while I'm stuck in

smoking too much

not eating enough

and hating myself

for worrying so greatly

how someone is

when I know they

have not
spent a single thought
on me

The 5th Horseman

I am Apocalypse

come in living form

I bring you

pain, anarchy, self destruction

a purveyor of purgatory

sins born of sincerity

thus I am

the incarnation

of flesh bound by

burning hot chains

so tied up

representing of these

tortured souls broken

down, anguishtic

poor mental health

lost of lust, obey

and consume

the oppressed has

become the oppressor

perish for me

all this death can

be yours

ripe for the taking

pick the fruit

Apple of Gomorrah

Sodom season begins

blood flows like rivers

down the gutter

fire sure to beautify

storm warning in effect

clouds of locusts

firstborn slain

End Times have come to

clean the human stain

personified projections

of personal terror, horror

Oh the humanity!

ashes to ashes

It all falls down

saddle and bridle

Plague, Famine, War, Death

mount up for 

tonight we

Ride

a 9 line dissertation on why I hate cold weather

light snow on the ground

cracked ice on the sidewalk

It looks like meth

walking in a Tina wonderland

the sight makes me 

wanna vomit

Drugs make me sick

Think about it-

you'll get it

patheticexorcist

Why in

the fuck did I

ever need to

know you?

I was perfectly accepting

of a miserable
existence, that I
was not meant
for happiness

Instead I get

fucked in the head cuz

I got to feel it

it knew me

now I can be miserable

in my existence cuz
I know happiness can

exist, it's beautiful

blue skies with

no black clouds

joyous rushes

with no needle

that is, until

it's mercilessly ripped

away from your

(finally) warm hand

leaving lips and eyes

dried to sand

making things so much worse

I should've jus died

or left the state when

I had my chance

instead I'm stuck

regurgitating demons

like some

pathetic exorcism

the power of Christ,

like pretty much everything

else in this depression 

wasteland, is not compelling

the end is nigh-ilism

Cuz I already am

well fucking aware

God is not on my side

sick son of a bitch
ignorance truly is

bliss

Syringe is the New Black

You'd almost be

shocked at how surprisingly

little it takes to

destroy your existence

a couple decades worth

of cc's, literal

multiple of 10

a lil h2o with

occasional combustion

reaching ignition point

Achieving this requires

very little start-up capital,

mere pocket change in

the grander scheme

it's not the buy in but

the interest that gets you

accustomed to a certain

lifestyle and racking up debt

til you're a customer to not working erstwhile and

wrecking up death

It's cool,

believe me it's cool

and then it's not

all fads must fade

the culture shifts,

passed by and passe

til you're the only

one left on the dancefloor,

the record skipping the same refrain

the others moved on

or got lost

the party cleared out

like in the late 20s

so why are you still

looking for a speakeasy

in all the same places?

Chairman of the bored

you know you're sick

of it

All

but habits are scary to stop

fear of missing out

full of missed opportunities

maybe it's time to cash out

reinvest in other futures

take stock of your

net worth

or you can tread the same trends

til it brings you only ends

you wouldn't necessarily choose

independent or puppet

be what you may

but at least glance at

your portfolio before

you go throw it away

half Full of Empty

Painting our protagonist

as a tragic figure

We are so well versed

in representing life

from our glass

half full of empty

Pictures worth thousands

of words

made of PoV shots

and filtered to fuck

self portraiture

Living a lie only

works if you believe

it yourself

"What a minute, who

am I here?"

juggling so many faces

attaching the wrong mask

It's all so overwhelming

all this politeness

for politeness sake

I can't do it well

my acting chops

dulled, got soft

and I lost the desire

to pretend I'm anything

less than miserable

misanthropic, zombified

with apathy, narcissist

self loathing waste

of time and space

I walk with stooped shoulders

carrying the weight

of my death wish

Sharpen my bones

lately I've been thinking

way too much and

especially, terribly

so much about you

Why is it that you

can't jus turn into 

a literal spectre

instead of only

ghosting me?

am I forever forsaken

destined to in all ways

be sickly haunted?

possessed even

I don't wanna know

I don't choose to

care but control is

not mine to have

I walk across hot coals

you walk on water

with the most natural grace

I stumble, stagger, and

burn for you in my

pursuit pointless

my orchard will prove fruitless

I shall starve in slow lay

a painful pathetic dying way

scratches to ashes, 

rust to dusk 

shriveled to husk

without a single last bite

of the forbidden apple

that could have stopped

and spared my decay

I know it's wat 

was most knee dead

I can feel it sharp

in my bones