"It's cool to be unmoved by everything"

boredom
disinterest
feeling under-joyed
lack of concern
and sometimes,
jus sometimes I wonder
is it a side effect
of the drugs?
is there a clinical
answer?
a scientific method
for the lost and the wretched
Better Living thru Chemistry
but we are nothing more
than chemicals
jus add water
our minds- they're not ruined
our minds- need the distraction
our minds (not so) secretly
hate us
a mild disconnect
there's an imbalance
in the chemicals
like Valium and Vyvanse
mixed and rum-soaked
thus remains the question;
are we coming or
are we going?
going insane- perhaps
going to extremes- always
going the way of dinosaurs- potentially
going to Hell- there's no doubt in my mind
my mind that hates me

Moira's Eye

hold my gaze
devil before me
look deep into me
demon of mine
I will get the utensils
my sword and shield
I will heat up
to cool off
with relief, with teeth
I have become
wat I wasn't, nor wat I want
but nonetheless
I have become
with your permission
this which you allow
in your infinite, ancient wisdom
you have blessed me
I will feed you
and when you are full
I will stare you down
hold my gaze devil
til the mirror breaks

Defracting

light over the sharpness
light reflects danger
light is not the same now
light is the enemy
light is destroying my life
life behind the sharpness
life refracts the danger
life was never sane before
life is killing me
life of my light

Ian Courtesy

I dont wanna hang around

with isolation

no heart, no soul

I broke bad

she's lost control

now my stash has dwindled

no more unknown pleasures

so now I'm choking

on all this atmosphere

epileptic fits of depression

an ideal for living

record repeats and skips

I'm swinging away

new dawn fades

closer, closer

closure, shadowplays                                             

with my mind

it has torn me apart

much like love and drugs

a means to an end

dead souls in glass

the interzone, insight

warsaw substance

my neck is stiff

failures haunt my dreams

disorder

on the day of the lords, 

a novelty

transmission passover

I remember nothing

(see how many Joy Division refs u can find, Answers Located in the Back)

Sensi-spiria

she uncovered the truth

of her mind and her situation

tried to embrace her fear

she dances around

while witches watch

she twirls for them

and grows lost

afraid, running thru halls

away from corpses

and the maggots in her diet

she's so hungry

confused, but she is strong

she can make it to the end

be the final girl

you're paranoid of a coven

or is it your imagination?

you may never know

Damn that weed was some fire... I think I'm growing paranoid

You're Next!

it's cuz i love you

that i wear the mask

my aim is true

fso run fast from regret

or it will bury you

we deserved better

so the deserved fear

loathing, fuck this world

it's too dark

so now i am too

heavy metal broke my heart

now i must break you

you're next

on the chopping block

and i'm sorry i'm

just not sorry

it's this way of life

how we live now

we must purge

free this beast within

and go towards the light

life drains from your eyes

i have removed the mask

i let it drop

Lushury

stagger about 

with my swagger out

two-stepping with one eye

on fire tonight

we burn the throat

what fun we were having

when what we did was secret

another bottle down

we take turns to drown

in an ocean of need

we want, we desire

there is no shaking

til the next mourning

but for now the sun is gone

but for now...

Dramatic Recreation