cabalina

of the essence
timing is everything
so seems either I
missed my cue
or my watch stopped,
allowing chance to
surpass me by
leaving this ghost
fuck you fates
for not taking
into account
certain facts such as
some wants never cease
thru calendar days
and phases of the moon
some desires always remain
pushed back
but not aside
some aches ingrain
they grow duller
not fade away
like polyester flowers
to the fashionable
sweet sick girl
I adore you
I wish I could squeeze
every drop of hurt
out of you
I would wear
your scars
added to my own
borne on my back
unrequited like
this yearn to embrace
and find myself lost in
your wide shining eyes
infected with the madness
tremble and quake
shiver and shake
I kneel before
this pulpit faithfully
bathed in your
holiest of waters
baptism by fire,
I burn for her
altar me
maybe I can be redeemed
if not saved...
wat could have been?
I can't call it
clock doesn't rewind
regardless of pleading
prayers on deaf ears
there's no blessing now
only this spiritual emptiness
my midnight self
bright and dark
but perhaps somewhere
in an alternate better place
some brave new world
we aren't scared
jus sacred
and I hold your hand
instead of your hair